So, along with my diagnosis of pneumonia came three rib fractures.
Why?
Uncertainty?
Wondering about running....heck, wondering about even walking!
Pain.
Trying to stay hopeful, undergoing tests to find out why. Thinking about not being able to run, shifting my goals, downsizing...reality.
Thinking about all the wonderful places running has taken me that I would have never gone. Hood River, Oregon. Big Sur. Chasing the sunrise from Julian to the desert. Back country of San Diego. The PCT. Appreciation and sadness.
Stay hopeful.
Thursday, September 5, 2019
Tuesday, August 27, 2019
Sometimes you have to let go of the dream...or do you...
So...pneumonia...broken ribs...enlarged heart...back issues...I thought I was pretty healthy. I thought my dream was achievable...a little crazy, but achievable. I wanted to be one of those 70-year-old ladies out there running their little legs off...not sure if that will happen.
I wanted to run 30, 50, 100 miles. I wanted to experience all the craziness of hallucinations and fatigue and pushing yourself farther than you ever thought possible.
But sometimes you have to let go...
Sometimes your body may be trying to tell you...hey, I've lived 55 years on this planet. I'm tired. I'm worn out, things are breaking. We are fragile, us crazy humans.
At this point walking a mile is an accomplishment. But....at least I can still do that.
But I can still dream...dream of running up a mountain, jumping over a stream, gazing out across the cloud covered mountains...in my dreams I can run as far, as fast, as high as anyone else. In my dreams....I will always be a runner.
I wanted to run 30, 50, 100 miles. I wanted to experience all the craziness of hallucinations and fatigue and pushing yourself farther than you ever thought possible.
But sometimes you have to let go...
Sometimes your body may be trying to tell you...hey, I've lived 55 years on this planet. I'm tired. I'm worn out, things are breaking. We are fragile, us crazy humans.
At this point walking a mile is an accomplishment. But....at least I can still do that.
But I can still dream...dream of running up a mountain, jumping over a stream, gazing out across the cloud covered mountains...in my dreams I can run as far, as fast, as high as anyone else. In my dreams....I will always be a runner.
Saturday, August 24, 2019
In sickness and in health...
We humans are fragile creatures. We can feel strong and invincible one minute and weak and struggling the next.
That is me right now...weak and struggling.
About three weeks ago I came down with one of the worst respiratory illnesses I have ever had. It started with a cough, chills, fever, shortness of breath. It was misery. Needless to say, it derailed my plans. At the time I was training for a 50K, which I had hoped would be my first ultra.
Now I'm struggling to do a mile at a very slow speed. I've never been very fast, always a back of the packer, but now...well, let's just say I'm starting over again. I'm hoping to be able to do a half marathon I signed up for in October.
This will be my journey back...on the road to good health again, on the road to being able to run at a turtle's pace again. I'm still not over my illness, it still has a grip on me, but I'm fighting.
Day one...
That is me right now...weak and struggling.
About three weeks ago I came down with one of the worst respiratory illnesses I have ever had. It started with a cough, chills, fever, shortness of breath. It was misery. Needless to say, it derailed my plans. At the time I was training for a 50K, which I had hoped would be my first ultra.
Now I'm struggling to do a mile at a very slow speed. I've never been very fast, always a back of the packer, but now...well, let's just say I'm starting over again. I'm hoping to be able to do a half marathon I signed up for in October.
This will be my journey back...on the road to good health again, on the road to being able to run at a turtle's pace again. I'm still not over my illness, it still has a grip on me, but I'm fighting.
Day one...
The journey back...road to recovery
We take so much for granted...the ability to run, to get outside, to do all the activities we normally do in a day...our health. This bout of pneumonia for me has been a definite wake-up call to appreciate everything. I can only hope that I can recover from this and get back to where I was.
Meanwhile...I am suffering. Along with the coughing, shortness of breath, fatigue, I seem to have injured some ribs. This is almost worse than the pneumonia. Certain movements cause excruciating pain, like someone is stabbing me in the side. It's not pleasant.
But today I got on the treadmill and did an Ifit workout. Not a hard one, of course, but walking along the beach in a beautiful setting with an inspiring trainer. I hope this is my road to recovery.
It's hard to believe that a month ago I had my sights on 31 miles...now I'm grateful for just one mile.
One mile at a time...attitude of gratitude...each step leads to another.
Meanwhile...I am suffering. Along with the coughing, shortness of breath, fatigue, I seem to have injured some ribs. This is almost worse than the pneumonia. Certain movements cause excruciating pain, like someone is stabbing me in the side. It's not pleasant.
But today I got on the treadmill and did an Ifit workout. Not a hard one, of course, but walking along the beach in a beautiful setting with an inspiring trainer. I hope this is my road to recovery.
It's hard to believe that a month ago I had my sights on 31 miles...now I'm grateful for just one mile.
One mile at a time...attitude of gratitude...each step leads to another.
Tuesday, June 11, 2019
Relentless forward progress....
Today was my first official "eating well" day. I've been running for a while now and never seemed to be able to lose weight. Well, the reason for that is simple...I ATE JUNK.
So today is my first day of eating better. I know the best thing for me personally is not to have junk in the house. Easier said than done, but I'm working on it.
So far today I have had an egg, a banana, a good salad with protein for lunch. I'm planning on having a chicken bowl for dinner. The hardest time for me is always the afternoon...the long span between lunch and dinner, which is also the time I exercise, so I have to have the proper nutrition to get me through that time of day. A good protein snack will do the trick.
One.day.at.a.time. I CAN DO THIS!
#eatinghealthy, #eatingforlife, #runnerdiet, #getthin
So today is my first day of eating better. I know the best thing for me personally is not to have junk in the house. Easier said than done, but I'm working on it.
So far today I have had an egg, a banana, a good salad with protein for lunch. I'm planning on having a chicken bowl for dinner. The hardest time for me is always the afternoon...the long span between lunch and dinner, which is also the time I exercise, so I have to have the proper nutrition to get me through that time of day. A good protein snack will do the trick.
One.day.at.a.time. I CAN DO THIS!
#eatinghealthy, #eatingforlife, #runnerdiet, #getthin
Sunday, June 9, 2019
Sometimes you feel all.alone...
Sometimes in your journey you are all alone.
Other people have the support, encouragement, etc., while you have...nothing.
Nothing but doubts...fear....anxiety.
So you have to take charge. You have to be your own cheering section.
You have stop looking for the encouragement that is NOT coming.
Nutrition plan:
- Lots of veggies
- vitamins, iron, etc.
- No dairy
- Low cholesterol
- Low fat
- lots of protein
- no hunger
Instead of "let's do this", it's I WILL DO THIS....ME...MYSELF.
Saturday, June 8, 2019
More to running than running...
There's more to running than running.
I've always known that, but in the shuffle of life, getting just a run in is hard...just running.
But...if you want to be a better runner, you need to develop more of your body than your legs.
So, in the spirit of that, my new conquest is to develop my strength training, my diet, along with my running.
Today I did:
- squats
- box jump - or my version of it, needs work.
- dumbbell power clean
- lunges - forward and backward
- planks
- superman
I have a long way to go, but it's a start!
Thursday, May 30, 2019
Not in love...
Today I am not in love with running.
I am doubting.
I can't make it, I'm too slow.
I can't keep my house clean and train for a long distance race. (I never could keep my house clean, so, there's that.)
Running hurts, I breathe hard, my heart pounds, my legs hurt.
I look funny when I run.
And then there's...why...why run..why hurt..why sweat..WHY?
I'll keep you posted.
I am doubting.
I can't make it, I'm too slow.
I can't keep my house clean and train for a long distance race. (I never could keep my house clean, so, there's that.)
Running hurts, I breathe hard, my heart pounds, my legs hurt.
I look funny when I run.
And then there's...why...why run..why hurt..why sweat..WHY?
I'll keep you posted.
Saturday, May 11, 2019
Ruined day....or is it?
So, today, I had aspirations of climbing Cucamonga Peak. It's been on my list for a while now. I had been trying to get company, but I'm sure I'll be going solo.
I had been checking the weather all week, hoping that it would improve. I checked, double checked, and triple checked. I kept seeing rain, so I decided it would be a treadmill Saturday. Not that I really mind, I love my treadmill. www.nordictrack.com It's a 2950 commercial and it's a beauty. However, nothing beats the real deal, the wind in the trees, the beauty of nature, etc. etc.
I keep telling myself I need to stop being a wimp and get out there. So you have to go solo...so what. Meanwhile, it's a treadmill day, even though the sun is shining.
#cucamongapeak, #optoutside, #nature, #godscountry, #treadmillday
I had been checking the weather all week, hoping that it would improve. I checked, double checked, and triple checked. I kept seeing rain, so I decided it would be a treadmill Saturday. Not that I really mind, I love my treadmill. www.nordictrack.com It's a 2950 commercial and it's a beauty. However, nothing beats the real deal, the wind in the trees, the beauty of nature, etc. etc.
I keep telling myself I need to stop being a wimp and get out there. So you have to go solo...so what. Meanwhile, it's a treadmill day, even though the sun is shining.
#cucamongapeak, #optoutside, #nature, #godscountry, #treadmillday
Wednesday, May 8, 2019
Compression socks...preworkout?
A new development in my running has been the need for compression socks. After an episode of inflammation (or something?) of a vein in my leg that sent me to the urgent care and ER, I have decided that compression socks are medically necessary for me.
However, putting these on is a workout in itself. They have to be snug, of course, in order to do their job. So that makes the job of putting them on so much harder. First you have to get the toes in the right place, then wiggle the sock on, making sure that it's not twisted. If it is, that's another struggle. Then pull them up into place over the sore calf...fun. Then once they're on one leg you get to start all over again with the other one! Gee. But, if this will prevent another painful episode of vein inflammation, I will struggle on. #thestruggleisreal #compressionsocks #injini #preworkout #veininflammation
www.injini.com
However, putting these on is a workout in itself. They have to be snug, of course, in order to do their job. So that makes the job of putting them on so much harder. First you have to get the toes in the right place, then wiggle the sock on, making sure that it's not twisted. If it is, that's another struggle. Then pull them up into place over the sore calf...fun. Then once they're on one leg you get to start all over again with the other one! Gee. But, if this will prevent another painful episode of vein inflammation, I will struggle on. #thestruggleisreal #compressionsocks #injini #preworkout #veininflammation
www.injini.com
Friday, May 3, 2019
2019 in a nutshell
Since I haven't blogged in a while, I have a lot to catch up on. 2019 has been a challenging year, one that makes me wonder if I'm meant to run...or at least my version of running.
Beginning in January, my first challenge was the never-ending chest cold. You know the kind, the kind that keeps you up all night coughing, where you feel like you are not getting enough air, you're producing enough phlegm to fill a stadium...you know, that kind. That was what I was faced with in my first run in January, the San Diego Trail Marathon that takes place in San Pasqual Valley in San Diego County. I had my usual anxiety about running compounded with this cold. And then it rained...not just a sprinkle, but a pouring, drenching, cold rain that left the trails in a mess of beautiful (?) mud. Up until the night before I had definite doubts about my sanity.
The morning of the race dawned with more rain...and mud. Fortunately, it did stop for the start of the race, but halfway through (at least for this turtle) the rain began again, just enough to leave me soaked for the second half. But the setting in San Pasqual Valley www.sdrp.org was beautiful enough to take my mind off the mud. It was a beautiful, challenging, fun race. We also stayed at Bandy Canyon Ranch, which is a wonderful, quaint, out of the way place. www.bandycanyon.com
Unfortunately my next race was a training race for Western States (in no way am I qualified for that), which is open to all (even the turtles), but the weather was not cooperating, so I gave into my sanity and didn't go to that one.
March brought us to San Diego for the San Diego Half Marathon. A tradition for us, we do it every year. Such a fun race. www.sdhalfmarathon.com
If you've read this far, thank you for your patience! This brings us to April and my DNF at Oriflamme 50K. oriflamme50k.com This was supposed to be my first ultramarathon. Well...not. This race takes place in beautiful Julian, then drops down into the desert, turns around and comes back. It was extremely challenging and I was not prepared enough. I ended up dropping out at 20 miles. It was a lesson learned.
Almost there! My final race was a 5K in San Diego in La Jolla with my husband and daughter, Kirstie. It was a lot of fun except the food poisoning. I made it through the race and ended up spending the rest of the weekend in bed.
So, this year has been a challenging year. I had so many aspirations and hopes of increasing distance, doing more trail runs, etc. I'm hoping that the second half of the year will be better. Thanks for reading!
Beginning in January, my first challenge was the never-ending chest cold. You know the kind, the kind that keeps you up all night coughing, where you feel like you are not getting enough air, you're producing enough phlegm to fill a stadium...you know, that kind. That was what I was faced with in my first run in January, the San Diego Trail Marathon that takes place in San Pasqual Valley in San Diego County. I had my usual anxiety about running compounded with this cold. And then it rained...not just a sprinkle, but a pouring, drenching, cold rain that left the trails in a mess of beautiful (?) mud. Up until the night before I had definite doubts about my sanity.
The morning of the race dawned with more rain...and mud. Fortunately, it did stop for the start of the race, but halfway through (at least for this turtle) the rain began again, just enough to leave me soaked for the second half. But the setting in San Pasqual Valley www.sdrp.org was beautiful enough to take my mind off the mud. It was a beautiful, challenging, fun race. We also stayed at Bandy Canyon Ranch, which is a wonderful, quaint, out of the way place. www.bandycanyon.com
Unfortunately my next race was a training race for Western States (in no way am I qualified for that), which is open to all (even the turtles), but the weather was not cooperating, so I gave into my sanity and didn't go to that one.
March brought us to San Diego for the San Diego Half Marathon. A tradition for us, we do it every year. Such a fun race. www.sdhalfmarathon.com
If you've read this far, thank you for your patience! This brings us to April and my DNF at Oriflamme 50K. oriflamme50k.com This was supposed to be my first ultramarathon. Well...not. This race takes place in beautiful Julian, then drops down into the desert, turns around and comes back. It was extremely challenging and I was not prepared enough. I ended up dropping out at 20 miles. It was a lesson learned.
Almost there! My final race was a 5K in San Diego in La Jolla with my husband and daughter, Kirstie. It was a lot of fun except the food poisoning. I made it through the race and ended up spending the rest of the weekend in bed.
So, this year has been a challenging year. I had so many aspirations and hopes of increasing distance, doing more trail runs, etc. I'm hoping that the second half of the year will be better. Thanks for reading!
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