So...pneumonia...broken ribs...enlarged heart...back issues...I thought I was pretty healthy. I thought my dream was achievable...a little crazy, but achievable. I wanted to be one of those 70-year-old ladies out there running their little legs off...not sure if that will happen.
I wanted to run 30, 50, 100 miles. I wanted to experience all the craziness of hallucinations and fatigue and pushing yourself farther than you ever thought possible.
But sometimes you have to let go...
Sometimes your body may be trying to tell you...hey, I've lived 55 years on this planet. I'm tired. I'm worn out, things are breaking. We are fragile, us crazy humans.
At this point walking a mile is an accomplishment. But....at least I can still do that.
But I can still dream...dream of running up a mountain, jumping over a stream, gazing out across the cloud covered mountains...in my dreams I can run as far, as fast, as high as anyone else. In my dreams....I will always be a runner.
Tuesday, August 27, 2019
Saturday, August 24, 2019
In sickness and in health...
We humans are fragile creatures. We can feel strong and invincible one minute and weak and struggling the next.
That is me right now...weak and struggling.
About three weeks ago I came down with one of the worst respiratory illnesses I have ever had. It started with a cough, chills, fever, shortness of breath. It was misery. Needless to say, it derailed my plans. At the time I was training for a 50K, which I had hoped would be my first ultra.
Now I'm struggling to do a mile at a very slow speed. I've never been very fast, always a back of the packer, but now...well, let's just say I'm starting over again. I'm hoping to be able to do a half marathon I signed up for in October.
This will be my journey back...on the road to good health again, on the road to being able to run at a turtle's pace again. I'm still not over my illness, it still has a grip on me, but I'm fighting.
Day one...
That is me right now...weak and struggling.
About three weeks ago I came down with one of the worst respiratory illnesses I have ever had. It started with a cough, chills, fever, shortness of breath. It was misery. Needless to say, it derailed my plans. At the time I was training for a 50K, which I had hoped would be my first ultra.
Now I'm struggling to do a mile at a very slow speed. I've never been very fast, always a back of the packer, but now...well, let's just say I'm starting over again. I'm hoping to be able to do a half marathon I signed up for in October.
This will be my journey back...on the road to good health again, on the road to being able to run at a turtle's pace again. I'm still not over my illness, it still has a grip on me, but I'm fighting.
Day one...
The journey back...road to recovery
We take so much for granted...the ability to run, to get outside, to do all the activities we normally do in a day...our health. This bout of pneumonia for me has been a definite wake-up call to appreciate everything. I can only hope that I can recover from this and get back to where I was.
Meanwhile...I am suffering. Along with the coughing, shortness of breath, fatigue, I seem to have injured some ribs. This is almost worse than the pneumonia. Certain movements cause excruciating pain, like someone is stabbing me in the side. It's not pleasant.
But today I got on the treadmill and did an Ifit workout. Not a hard one, of course, but walking along the beach in a beautiful setting with an inspiring trainer. I hope this is my road to recovery.
It's hard to believe that a month ago I had my sights on 31 miles...now I'm grateful for just one mile.
One mile at a time...attitude of gratitude...each step leads to another.
Meanwhile...I am suffering. Along with the coughing, shortness of breath, fatigue, I seem to have injured some ribs. This is almost worse than the pneumonia. Certain movements cause excruciating pain, like someone is stabbing me in the side. It's not pleasant.
But today I got on the treadmill and did an Ifit workout. Not a hard one, of course, but walking along the beach in a beautiful setting with an inspiring trainer. I hope this is my road to recovery.
It's hard to believe that a month ago I had my sights on 31 miles...now I'm grateful for just one mile.
One mile at a time...attitude of gratitude...each step leads to another.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)